The Collected Schizophrenias- A Book Review

A friend recommended this book, The Collected Schizophrenias for our monthly book club pick, but as a group we did not select it. I looked into the book a bit more and decided to read it because this topic has always interested me greatly. This book is a sort of memoir with a heavy amount of medical research dispersed throughout. The author having the disorder herself has spent a lot of time learning and dealing with the disorder. My interest was sparked due to my own personal connection with the disease.

When I was a kid my best friend's uncle was someone who I interacted with regularly and had schizophrenia. I recall him talking to himself in the kitchen one night while making a sandwich. I thought he was talking to me, but it was soon clear that it was someone else. He would comment and then reply in a different voice or he'd simply look over and continue the conversation with the empty space next to him. It was clear that he was hallucinating or having delusions, but it wasn't something I fully understood. From films and TV, I thought that he was possessed or just plain crazy. My best friend mentioned that he had always been this way and that he was schizophrenic. I had heard the word before and nodded as though I understood, but what I really heard was that her uncle was crazy. Her family attributed this behavior to his use of drugs. They seemed to think that his drug use trigger his mental illness.

It is clear, now years later, that the two probably went hand in hand. With the inability to treat his symptoms, he likely turned to drugs for some relief. He was also gay and grew up in a deeply religious household. His personal issues definitely expanded beyond his mental illness.

In our early 20s my best friend, let's call her Ace, started exhibiting some odd behaviors after giving birth to her son. She got pregnant while in college and ended up having to take time off when she gave birth and first become a mother. She was absolutely brilliant and was studying engineering/math. College took a back seat and she was in a few long term relationships, but they ended and soon around the age of 23 she started to show signs of having some major mental health concerns. As time went on, her condition progressed rapidly and she soon became inconsolable. 

I often play back one instance in where I greatly feared for her and more importantly for her sister's life. Ace had called me from her house phone in a panic saying that something was wrong with her cellphone. She asked if I could come over immediately and assist her. I went to her house and saw the look in her eyes and it was clear that she was in a panic. She started chatting with a person on T-Mobile's online site to figure out if they could help her locate her phone. Next thing I knew she was angry and saying that they were all working against her. Everyone was working against her and the people tracking her were now in the computer too. She was in a frenzy and began to talk rather quickly about why and how they were after her. I tried to calm her and provide what I thought to be rational reasoning and evidence that her thoughts had obviously taken a turn and she'd gotten away from herself. 

Soon Ace began to discuss the conspiracy and how it all involved her older sister. Her whole family was out of town camping that weekend. We were at the house alone. I invited over one of our other friends, we will call her Cece, because it was clear that I needed help. I wasn't sure exactly why Ace was behaving this way, but I thought another familiar and friendly face might help the situation. Cece arrived and I could quickly see the shock on her face as Ace began to detail the conspiracy to her too. Next thing we know, Ace comes out of her bedroom with a baseball bat and begins to beat down her sister's bedroom door. She is screaming at the top of her lungs "I know you're in there, come out you fucking bitch. I know what you're doing." After a moment with no response, she calms herself down and then says she's going to destroy her sister's car, which is sitting in the drive way. Both Cece and I stand up and quickly say as calmly as possible, "She's not here... remember she went camping with your mom and family? Please calm down, you don't want to ruin her car or do anything you'll regret." Ace eyed us both suspiciously, but soon thought it better to go back into her room and think over this information. I quickly busied myself with notifying Ace's mom to be careful once they came home because Ace was terribly troubled and angry with her older sister. Her mom shared that these delusions had been happening for quite some time and they'd begun to get out of hand. That weekend, once her family came home, Ace was involuntarily committed by her family. 

I had been certain that she would receive the proper diagnosis and be labeled as schizophrenic and receive the treatment and medication she needed. Ace was good though. Apparently she told the doctors what they needed to hear and they only made mention of depression and anxiety as her diagnosis. Everything that had happened before, she refused to share. People out to get her? No way. Conspiracies, speakers in the vents, viruses tracking her computer history, that's ridiculous! She acted as though none of it had ever occurred. She cried and said she just anted to go home and be with her loving family. Over the next decade these same types of behaviors would cycle and become part of Ace's regular lifestyle and struggles. Ace would be well enough to get a job for a few months and then after some time she'd be sent home because she couldn't stop crying at her desk. She would enroll in college courses, only to drop out a few months into the course because she couldn't keep herself grounded enough to complete the course work. She'd been to doctors, on various medications, was diagnosed with bi-polar disorder, depression, anxiety etc. There were stories of rape, abuse, and getting into fist fights with random people that she would tell us, usually after having been missing for a few days. She began to do drugs and this all led to her mother kicking her out. The end result is that she's now typically on drugs and lives out on the streets. She regularly comes home to visit her family and son, but often talks non-sense. The whole neighborhood knows her and find her to be fairly harmless. At the young age of 30 she's already lost herself to the disease and while I hold out hope that one day she'll be able to function again, her future seems grim. Her uncle passed away a few years back. He was hit by a car while crossing a major street one night. 

I know that I am giving a lot of back story here that has nothing to do with the book, but this is my history and very limited understanding of the disease. I was excited at the prospect of someone with the disease writing a book and detailing the experience from their point of view.

The author is an expert in more ways than just the fact that she's has the disease herself. She's spent time doing research and educating herself in the field of mental health and has also been part of the system for more than a decade. What is also clear is that she seems to be an anomaly. Her ability to cope and her support systems are not the norm for a person with this disease and she often mentions that herself throughout the book. While reading I learned more about the disease itself and what a person can or typically cannot do when inflicted with this disorder. It was also clear that many of the author's doctors throughout the years were always reluctant to diagnose her with schizophrenia because it isn't something that is easily manageable or curable. Once you receive that label then you must deal with the stigma that comes with it. Aside from that there aren't too many medications that simply solve the issues that come along with hallucinations and delusions. It was clear that even while on medication a person's grip on reality was always going to be shaky at best.

I now see my hope for Ace is nothing more than a pipe dream. It will be very unlikely that she will ever be a full functioning person. After reading this book and understanding that this disease eats away at your brain tissue over time, that seems to make it clear that you'll never heal and if anything time only makes it worse. It almost seems as though this disorder remains a mystery to us and what we have learned about it, while slightly helpful, is also extremely limited. 

I would highly recommend the book to anyone who is interested in this field, or more specifically this disorder. If you want to understand the disease from the point of view of a person who's living with it, it is a great read. I would also recommend it to someone who is trying to learn more because a friend or family member has been diagnosed as schizophrenic. If you're looking to read this book and wondering if you'll find information about a cure or great coping mechanisms, this isn't the book for you. However the author did highlight some coping techniques that she's acquired along the way.